Positive and Negative Interactions between Mother-in-law and Daughter-in-law: What about Son-in-law?
Keywords:
conflict with mother-in-law, daughter-in-law, son-in-law, in-law relationships, marital satisfaction
Abstract
Mother-in-law (MIL) and daughter-in-law (DIL) relationship is frequently studied due to its turbulent nature. Conflict with mother-in-law also contributes to poorer marital satisfaction. However, few researchers have included son-in-law (SIL) in their studies and neglected how this relationship contributes to couples’ marital satisfaction. This study included son-in-law and investigated the relationships between couples’ positive and negative interactions with mother-in-law and their relationships with marital satisfaction. A total of 197 Malaysian Chinese dual-earners (110 males and 87 females) reported on the following scales: positive and negative interactions with mother-in-law, and marital satisfaction. Gender differences are compared between mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship and mother-in-law/son-in-law relationship. These variables were tested via four hypotheses, the relationship between positive interactions with mother-in-law and marital satisfaction, the relationship between negative interactions with mother-in-law and marital satisfaction, and gender differences in the associations tested. Gender differences were found in negative interactions with mothers-in-law and their associations with marital satisfaction. The results were discussed in regards to the importance of the inclusion of son-in-law in examining in-law relationships and marital satisfaction.
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References
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Norton, R. (1983). Measuring marital quality: A critical look at the dependent variable. Journal of Marriage and Family, 45(1), 141. https://doi.org/10.2307/351302
Oshio, T., Nozaki, K., & Kobayashi, M. (2013). Division of household labor and marital satisfaction in China, Japan, and Korea. Journal of Family and Economic Issues, 34(2), 211–223. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10834-012-9321-4
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Rittenour, C., & Soliz, J. (2009). Communicative and relational dimensions of shared family identity and relational intentions in mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationships: Developing a conceptual model for mother-in-law/daughter-in-law research. Western Journal of Communication, 73(1), 67–90. https://doi.org/10.1080/10570310802636334
Sabatelli, R. M. (1988). Exploring relationship satisfaction: A social exchange perspective on the interdependence between theory, research, and practice. Family Relations, 37, 217–222. https://doi.org/10.2307/584323
Tan, C.-B. (1983). Chinese religion in Malaysia: A general view. Asian Folklore Studies, 42(2), 217. https://doi.org/10.2307/1178483
Tan, S. H. (2004). Filial daughters-in-law: Questioning Confucian filiality. In A. K. L. Chan & S. H. Tan (Eds.), Filial Piety in Chinese Thought and History (1st ed., pp. 226–240). RoutledgeCurzon. https://doi.org/10.4324/9780203413883
Triandis, H. C., Bontempo, R., Villareal, M. J., Asai, M., & Lucca, N. (1988). Individualism and collectivism: Cross-cultural perspectives on self-ingroup relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 54(2), 323–338. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.54.2.323
Woolley, M. E., & Greif, G. (2018). Mother-in-Law reports of closeness to daughter-in-law: The determinant triangle with the son and husband. Social Work, 64(1). https://doi.org/10.1093/sw/swy055
Wu, T. F., Yeh, K. H., Cross, S. E., Larson, L. M., Wang, Y. C., & Tsai, Y. L. (2010). Conflict with mothers-in-law and Taiwanese women’s marital satisfaction: The moderating role of husband support. The Counseling Psychologist, 38(4), 497–522. https://doi.org/10.1177/0011000009353071
Zheng, Y. P., & Lin, K. M. (1994). A nationwide study of stressful life events in Mainland China. Psychosomatic Medicine, 56(4), 296–305. https://doi.org/10.1097/00006842-199407000-00004
Bryant, C. M., Conger, R. D., & Meehan, J. M. (2001). The influence of in-laws on change in marital success. Journal of Marital and Family, 63, 614–626. https://doi.org/https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1741-3737.2001.00614.x
Chan, S. Y. (2000). Gender and relationship roles in the analects and the Mencius. Asian Philosophy, 10(2), 115–132. https://doi.org/10.1080/09552360050121119
Cordova, J. V, Fleming, C. J. E., Morrill, M. I., Hawrilenko, M., Sollenberger, J. W., Harp, A. G., … Wachs, K. (2014). The marriage checkup: A randomized controlled trial of annual relationship health checkups. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 82(4), 592–604. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0037097
Eagly, A. H., & Wood, W. (1999). The origins of sex differences in human behavior. American Psychologist, 54(6), 408–423. https://doi.org/https://doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.54.6.408
Eagly, A. H., & Wood, W. (2012). Social role theory. In P. A. M. Van Lange, A. W. Kruglanski, & E. T. Higgins (Eds.), Handbook of Theories of Social Psychology (pp. 458–476). Thousand Oaks, CA: SAGE Publications. https://doi.org/10.4135/9781446249222.n49
Fingerman, K. L., Gilligan, M., VanderDrift, L., & Pitzer, L. (2012). In-law Relationships Before and After Marriage. Research in Human Development, 9(2), 106–125. https://doi.org/10.1080/15427609.2012.680843
Fingerman, K. L., & Hay, E. L. (2002). Searching under the streetlight?: Age biases in the personal and family relationships literature. Personal Relationships, 9, 415–433. https://doi.org/https://doi.org/10.1111/1475-6811.09404
Henrich, J., Heine, S. J., & Norenzayan, A. (2010). The weirdest people in the world? Behavioral and Brain Sciences, 33(2/3), 61–135. https://doi.org/DOI: 10.1017/S0140525X0999152X
Hofstede, G. (2001). Culture’s consequences: Comparing values, behaviors, institutions, and organizations across nations (2nd ed.). Thousand Oaks, CA: SAGE.
Huang, W. J. (2005). An Asian perspective on relationship and marriage education. Family Process, 44(2), 161–173. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1545-5300.2005.00051.x
Kamarudin, Z. (1993). A comparative study of divorce among muslims and non-muslims in Malaysia with special interest to the federal territory of Kuala Lumpur. University of London. Retrieved from https://discovery.ucl.ac.uk/id/eprint/1317888/
Karney, B. R., & Bradbury, T. N. (1995). The longitudinal course of marital quality and stability : A review of theory , method , and research. Psychological Bulletin, 118(1), 3–34. https://doi.org/10.1037//0033-2909.118.1.3
Kim, M.-J., & Kim, Y.-J. (2015). Experience of relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law among Korea rural married immigrant women: With a focus on daughter-in-laws from China, Vietnam and the Philippines who live with their mother-in-laws in Korea. Indian Journal of Science and Technology, 8(S1), 307. https://doi.org/10.17485/ijst/2015/v8is1/59292
Landis, J. T. (1947). Adjustments after marriage. Marriage and Family Living, 9(2), 32–34. https://doi.org/10.2307/347294
Lee, M. H. (2010). Confucian traditions in modern East Asia : Their destinies and prospects. Philosophy of the Social Sciences, 39, 23–27. Retrieved from http://www.jstor.org/stable/24047744
Lim, S. L., & Lim, B. K. (2012). Po xi wen ti: The mother-in-law problem - navigating tradition and modernity in transforming familial relationships in the Chinese family. Journal of Family Psychotherapy, 23(3), 202–216. https://doi.org/10.1080/08975353.2012.705649
Marshall, T. C. (2008). Cultural differences in intimacy: The influence of gender-role ideology and individualism-collectivism. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 25(1), 143–168. https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407507086810
Morr Serewicz, M. C. (2008). Toward a triangular theory of the communication and relationships of in-laws: Theoretical proposal and social relations analysis of relational satisfaction and private disclosure in in-law triads. Journal of Family Communication, 8(4), 264–292. https://doi.org/10.1080/15267430802397161
National Population and Family Development Board, N. (2014). Fifth Malaysian population and family survey [MPFS-5]. Retrieved from http://familyrepository.lppkn.gov.my/659/1/Report on Key Findings Fifth Malaysian Populationand Family Survey %28MPFS-5%29 2014.pdf
Ng, K., Loy, J. T. C., Gudmunson, C. G., & Cheong, W. (2009). Gender differences in marital and life satisfaction among Chinese Malaysians. Sex Roles, 60(1–2), 33–43. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-008-9503-6
Norton, R. (1983). Measuring marital quality: A critical look at the dependent variable. Journal of Marriage and Family, 45(1), 141. https://doi.org/10.2307/351302
Oshio, T., Nozaki, K., & Kobayashi, M. (2013). Division of household labor and marital satisfaction in China, Japan, and Korea. Journal of Family and Economic Issues, 34(2), 211–223. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10834-012-9321-4
Pitzer, L., Fingerman, K. L., & Lefkowitz, E. S. (2011). Development of the Parent Adult Relationship Questionnaire (PARQ). The International Journal of Aging and Human Development, 72(2), 111–135. https://doi.org/10.2190/AG.72.2.b
Raymo, J. M., Park, H., Xie, Y., & Yeung, W. J. J. (2015). Marriage and family in East Asia: Continuity and change. Annual Review of Sociology, 41, 471–492. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-soc-073014-112428
Rittenour, C. E. (2012). Daughter-in-law standards for mother-in-law communication: Associations With daughter-in-law perceptions of relational satisfaction and shared family identity. Journal of Family Communication, 12(2), 93–110. https://doi.org/10.1080/15267431.2010.537240
Rittenour, C. E., & Kellas, J. K. (2015). Making sense of hurtful mother-in-law messages: Applying attribution theory to the in-law triad. Communication Quarterly, 63(1), 62–80. https://doi.org/10.1080/01463373.2014.965837
Rittenour, C., & Soliz, J. (2009). Communicative and relational dimensions of shared family identity and relational intentions in mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationships: Developing a conceptual model for mother-in-law/daughter-in-law research. Western Journal of Communication, 73(1), 67–90. https://doi.org/10.1080/10570310802636334
Sabatelli, R. M. (1988). Exploring relationship satisfaction: A social exchange perspective on the interdependence between theory, research, and practice. Family Relations, 37, 217–222. https://doi.org/10.2307/584323
Tan, C.-B. (1983). Chinese religion in Malaysia: A general view. Asian Folklore Studies, 42(2), 217. https://doi.org/10.2307/1178483
Tan, S. H. (2004). Filial daughters-in-law: Questioning Confucian filiality. In A. K. L. Chan & S. H. Tan (Eds.), Filial Piety in Chinese Thought and History (1st ed., pp. 226–240). RoutledgeCurzon. https://doi.org/10.4324/9780203413883
Triandis, H. C., Bontempo, R., Villareal, M. J., Asai, M., & Lucca, N. (1988). Individualism and collectivism: Cross-cultural perspectives on self-ingroup relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 54(2), 323–338. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.54.2.323
Woolley, M. E., & Greif, G. (2018). Mother-in-Law reports of closeness to daughter-in-law: The determinant triangle with the son and husband. Social Work, 64(1). https://doi.org/10.1093/sw/swy055
Wu, T. F., Yeh, K. H., Cross, S. E., Larson, L. M., Wang, Y. C., & Tsai, Y. L. (2010). Conflict with mothers-in-law and Taiwanese women’s marital satisfaction: The moderating role of husband support. The Counseling Psychologist, 38(4), 497–522. https://doi.org/10.1177/0011000009353071
Zheng, Y. P., & Lin, K. M. (1994). A nationwide study of stressful life events in Mainland China. Psychosomatic Medicine, 56(4), 296–305. https://doi.org/10.1097/00006842-199407000-00004
Published
2021-05-10
How to Cite
Leong, M. S. and Juhari, R. (2021) “Positive and Negative Interactions between Mother-in-law and Daughter-in-law: What about Son-in-law?”, Malaysian Journal of Social Sciences and Humanities (MJSSH), 6(5), pp. 84 - 94. doi: 10.47405/mjssh.v6i5.778.
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